Options Seven Second Delay with Ken and Andy: Playlist from August 2, 2017 Options

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Ken and Andy further lower WFMU's already abysmal standards as the program enters its death throes. Stunt radio which subjects the radio audience to concepts and topics which mature adults should not have to endure. Find the fatal flaw. (Visit homepage.)

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Options August 2, 2017: Making the Kickstarter Video by Watching the WFMU Billboard Focus Group

Andy has returned from vacation at Kitty Hawk, where he gave his wife face time every day. The billboard effort is underway, and Ken and Andy have work to do. They need to create promo videos for their Kickstarter campaign, and they need to converge on a final idea of what to display on the billboard.

Kimzilla arranged for a focus group with real civilians at the Newport Center Mall, where mockups of 10 billboard ideas were presented to 12-13 people. Video footage was taken. It is determined that Ken and Andy have three videos to shoot for the Kickstarter campaign - 1) Intro/setup, 2) Analysis of the focus group results, and 3) Summary/wrap-up.

Cameras have been placed in the studio. Before reviewing the focus group, Ken and Andy attempt to shoot the Intro video. Things go a bit off the rails - numerous takes are needed, and Andy prays to God to strike Ken dead, but after some chaos and five takes, the video is basically shot.

Next up, a review of the focus group results. The self-effacing humor approach doesn't seem to land well with this group, and the prevailing reaction to many of these types of ideas is to be baffled, confused, insulted, and unclear if this advertisement is even for a radio station. Straightforward jokes, such as "4 out of 5 doctors recommend WFMU, the fifth doctor is an asshole" are received much more positively. Andy’s much discussed “dead mother” idea goes over quite poorly, offending most of the group. Racially inspired billboard ideas also are not popular, with "100% Jew Free" being described as "insensitive" and "cringe-worthy". The "Rihanna, Bieber, (Charles) Manson" billboard is well received - turns out there are several Charles Manson fans in the group. This one may well be the winner of the focus group.

A Summary video is quickly assembled as the show comes to a close.

Recap by Andrew M.

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Artist Approx. start time
Ken & Andy  0:00:00 (Pop‑up)

Listener comments!

Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:00pm PMD:

I can't believe I am through.
Avatar 6:02pm dale:

long time fan.
  6:02pm geo in jc:

Are the phones working?
Avatar 6:03pm dale:

andy can chew gum and entertain and insult all at the same time.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:03pm PMD:

He's a horse.
  6:03pm cat:

the brothers wright made bikes which are better than airplanes and pollute less
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:05pm steve:

$5000?! thats much less than i wouldve thought
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:05pm unpopularfred:

If an accident happens in front of the billboard, it will get exposure on the TV news report.
  6:06pm cat:

michael jackson is dead his dr. is in jail. put thekenschlampen and weed legalization on the billboard. cory booker exmayor supports it
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:08pm Ken From Hyde Park:

This seems to be an argument that neither party will win.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:09pm PMD:

Do we get to see? Do we have to see?
  6:09pm cat:

any asian djs on the air? possibly creamo. . .
Avatar 6:12pm dale:

i was wearing my blue eat flaming death tee shirt at the verizon store today and a gorgeous russian lady with her gorgeous russian daughter was staring at me. she smiled finally and said 'i like your shirt.' THANK YOU wfmu.
  6:13pm em2c:

@dale -- she liked the re-purposed commie propaganda imagery, perhaps?
Avatar 6:13pm JakeGould:

$50 each or $50 spread over a group of people?
Avatar 6:15pm dale:

maybe - she looked sort of like deanna troi from star trek tng.
Avatar 6:15pm Jeff:

Why does Andy always sound overmodulated?

Maybe that's just his voice.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:15pm PMD:

Wouldn't you feel bad Andy if he did die?
Avatar 6:16pm JakeGould:

@Jeff: Maybe he’s just endlessly burping?
  6:16pm em2c:

@Jeff -- his microphone technique is deliberately bad? it's part of the charm, I guess
Avatar 6:16pm dale:

overmodulated or authoritative?
Avatar 6:16pm Jeff:

Maybe he's gargling gum.
Avatar 6:16pm pocket vito:

That first one was terrible. You should write out a script, so there's no uhh, uhh, and no improvising half-assed jokes that make no sense, and you should read it with enthusiasm!
  6:17pm Torbjørn:

Bordering on passive-aggressive at this point. "HEY, I'M ANDY BRECKMAN :|"
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:19pm chad from oregon:

The apology alone would be a great promo.
Avatar 6:19pm Marcel M:

The only thing dumber than this idea is the fact that I'm listening to it and mildly enjoying it.
Avatar 6:19pm TehBadDr:

Other rewards? Can I dress up in a Bear suit and rape Andy?
  6:19pm Drunken Creep:

Can't wait to see this billboard on the highway!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:19pm PMD:

So can we call in?
Avatar 6:20pm JakeGould:

@MarcelM: Some of the best ideas in the world are horrible.
Avatar 6:20pm pocket vito:

I'm looking forward to hearing what the 10 ideas are
Avatar 6:21pm pocket vito:

No way Andy masturbated twice just before this. He sounds way too tense.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:21pm chris:

is there no post production?
Avatar 6:23pm JakeGould:

You’re reach around thinking, Andy.
Avatar 6:25pm Marcel M:

It says music doesn't it? What a rube
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:26pm PMD:

"do you want that woman listening to your station?"
Avatar 6:26pm pocket vito:

How about "WFMU: 4 out of 5 doctors don't listen"
Avatar 6:27pm TehBadDr:

This Dr listens!
Avatar 6:28pm pocket vito:

Awesome
Avatar 6:28pm Fredericks:

Ken, put up some Gifs. We want to see what they're commenting on.
Avatar 6:29pm Marcel M:

Even basic b's have colored hair now
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:29pm unpopularfred:

Do these people really not know a joke when they see one?
Avatar 6:29pm pocket vito:

Here's the fatal flaw, you're assuming people have a sense of humor
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:30pm PMD:

Why isn't that the billboard? edgy to a fault
  6:30pm james f:

edgy to a fault is a GREAT billboard
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:30pm PMD:

OK, maybe not.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:31pm joe mulligan:

Dan is a great focus group moderator
Avatar 6:32pm Fredericks:

unpopularfred: have you seen who's the president?
  6:32pm frulia:

These people wouldn't know reverse psychology or a joke if it hit them in the face!
  6:32pm coleusound:

WFMU: Good... we don't want you here anyways.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:32pm steve:

yeah "edgy to a fault" is good
Avatar 6:34pm pocket vito:

Maybe the billboard should just say Shut Up Weirdo!
  6:34pm Drunken Creep:

When I think of an inviting wfmu billboard, i think "Free Form Radio" stated along with positive imagery.
  6:34pm noel:

"IF YOU LIKE BILLY JOEL THEN DON'T LISTEN TO WFMU 91.1 FM"
Avatar 6:35pm JakeGould:

“JOHN 3:15 • WFMU 91.1”
Avatar 6:35pm pocket vito:

Maybe say the fifth doctor is a dick? Instead of asshole.
Avatar 6:35pm TehBadDr:

pocket Vito is in the big pocket of Weirdo!
Avatar 6:35pm Fredericks:

The fifth doctor is deaf!
Avatar 6:36pm WakkaWakka:

or just A$$ hole
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:36pm unpopularfred:

I obviously like this one
Avatar 6:36pm Marcel M:

Its amazing how few people have a sense of humor..
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:36pm PMD:

Isn't Andy's middle name Insulting?
Avatar 6:37pm Marcel M:

Pretty sure self deprecating music didn't start with 20 somethings.
Avatar 6:37pm Marcel M:

Music? I meant comedy. I'll stop talking now.
Avatar 6:38pm JakeGould:

“DANK MEMES • WFMU 91.1FM” (all in Comics Sans)
Avatar 6:38pm TehBadDr:

Isn't Andy generally insulting?
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:38pm unpopularfred:

Change the Fonz? Never!
Avatar 6:39pm Fredericks:

One-way mirror? Are most two-way?
  6:39pm Drunken Creep:

It's funny to be mad about people forgetting about richard nixon
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:39pm chad from oregon:

I only have two-way's in my house
Avatar 6:40pm TehBadDr:

The Nixon thing, just cut to the chase and have Trump!
Avatar 6:40pm pocket vito:

I only have three-ways in my house. Ohhhh!!
Avatar 6:40pm JakeGould:

POLK.
TRUMP.
NIXON.
WFMU.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:40pm RomanDogBird:

didn't these jerks watch tv growing up like i did
Avatar 6:40pm Fredericks:

Which way?
Avatar 6:41pm JakeGould:

“Any One-Way But Loose”
  6:41pm cat:

nixon resigned not impeached
Avatar 6:41pm TehBadDr:

Andy, you should feel bad about that!
Avatar 6:42pm Fredericks:

"Two way mirrors (one way mirrors) are used for security, privacy, infinity mirrors, optical illusions, hidden televisions, smart mirrors, and teleprompters."
Avatar 6:42pm Marcel M:

haha
Avatar 6:43pm JakeGould:

Terri Gross’s show is all about dead mothers. No big whoop.
Avatar 6:43pm Jeff:

Normals creep me out.
Avatar 6:43pm TehBadDr:

All my mirrors are 3-way. just to keep the elders in the loop!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:43pm chris:

amen, Jeff.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:44pm PMD:

I love that! You don't think I'm funny, come tell me that in my swimming pool.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:44pm steve:

i feel like these people wouldn't be able to sit through 10 minutes of wfmu
Avatar 6:44pm dale:

that's a show (if it hasn't been done) - bring in people who think andy is not funny and see if andy can make them laugh.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:44pm Sebastian:

this whole idea is one big fatal flaw
- I love the dead mother one!
  6:45pm Coleusound:

"WFMU: Mostly just noise". then they tune in thinking its a joke. That's the joke
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:45pm RomanDogBird:

"cringeworthy", who coined that. i'm gonna knock your block off.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:45pm Ken From Hyde Park:

"WFMU: The former home of Nachum Segal."
Avatar 6:46pm TehBadDr:

FMU is infested with Jews! I can tell I share the blood line!
Avatar 6:46pm JakeGould:

“I’m not a Jew!” THANK GOD SOMEONE IS HONEST!!!
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:46pm chris:

"WFMU: your niche market"
  6:46pm ScottC:

This reminds me of the CAN TV series called "Slings $ Arrows" about a Theater Co trying to rebrand away from their older subscribers to a younger demo. The Co hires this goofy Ad Agency that uses pictures of cancer patients and bad review clippings.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:46pm chad from oregon:

WFMU: There's a niche market for it.
Avatar 6:46pm pocket vito:

"WFMU: We LOVE your ethnic group!"
Avatar 6:47pm JakeGould:

“WFMU: Making Narrowcasting Even Narrower”
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:47pm chris:

Slings and arrows was a great show.
  6:47pm Coleusound:

Tune in to WFMU or we'll tell your wife.
Avatar 6:47pm JakeGould:

“WFMU: WE LOVE JEWS THIS MUCH!” and the billboard are two huge cartoon arms stretched out.
Avatar 6:48pm dale:

91.1 - the new station of kars for kids.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:49pm Ken From Hyde Park:

"Listen to 91.1 WFMU. We dare you!"
  6:49pm yuugi:

Ken did 91.1
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:49pm chris:

"WFMU: if the other Manson made music, we'd play that shit, too."
Avatar 6:49pm TehBadDr:

FMU-we even dare to play Nickel-back!
Avatar 6:50pm JakeGould:

“Pets? Food? WFMU! 91.1FM”
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:50pm Ken From Hyde Park:

"WFMU: Free your mind and your ears will follow."
Avatar 6:51pm dale:

91.1 - a kike, a mick and a spic walk into a bar.....

THAT will get folks to tune in
  6:51pm Drunken Creep:

Free your radio and your ears will follow
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:52pm Ken From Hyde Park:

"This guy <picture> started listening to WFMU. Tune in and find out what happened next."
Avatar 6:53pm dale:

91.1 - bikini girls on fire.
  6:53pm Drunken Creep:

Free Your Radio!
91.1FM
WFMU.ORG
  6:53pm Listener Robert:

They got done removing the tree limb that fell across the utility lines out front. Did I miss anything?
Avatar 6:53pm JakeGould:

“WFMU 91.1FM • Music Streams and Dank Memes”
Avatar 6:53pm TehBadDr:

@Dale , that would work well!
  6:54pm yeyo:

WFMU. If a Jodorowski film was a radio station
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:54pm PMD:

Let your preference be known.
Avatar 6:54pm TehBadDr:

Bikini girls on fire! And now with less Jews!
Avatar 6:54pm dale:

thought i met get banned for that concept - but there are NO bad ideas.
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:55pm Ken From Hyde Park:

"WFMU: 167 hours of radio per week without Andy Breckman!"
  6:55pm Listener Robert:

On US 206 northbound in Stanhope we need one for WMFU, 90.1: "Just over this hill, you can start listening to our over-the-hill DJs."
Avatar 6:56pm pocket vito:

Hey Andy - why don't you just pay for the WHOLE THING??
Avatar 6:56pm TehBadDr:

ZOMG that start of an evil enterprise!
Avatar 6:56pm pocket vito:

What I did on my summer vacation, aka, how to please your man
  6:56pm Old Dave:

All my current ideas are band-worthy.
Not saying. You're welcome!
  6:57pm Drunken Creep:

I'll definitely be giving to kickstarter, and will love to see that billboard. Yet I gotta say, you guys are a rockin' good positive station, why have so many negative angles on billboard images? Life is like WFMU, you never know what you're gonna get
  6:57pm Old Dave:

banned
  6:58pm ScottC:

Manson won't sue you but Tex will come to your hous cut your throat and smear blood all over your refrig
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:59pm PMD:

going to my funeral
  6:59pm Listener Robert:

Another idea for the US 206 billboard for WMFU: "Continuing north, you can listen to our programming go south."
  6:59pm cat:

if you play music by the artist then you can argue that you can use their image because you provide a service related to their image
Avatar Swag For Life Member 6:59pm Ken From Hyde Park:

Canyonlands is great. Hang out under Delicate Arch in the darkening twilight. You half expect a dinosaur to walk around the corner.
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